The date: Friday 9th March 2012
The place: Addison's bar, Hereford United Social Club
The motive: Unclear
In what appears to be an unprovoked attack, the captain's first ball (reports from the scene have not confirmed which leg), was intercepted. Authorities are currently working on a 'lone footman' theory. The perpetrator has been identified by at least 11 eye witnesses but cannot be named for legal reasons. Under questioning he was evasive and appeared embarassed. This is unlikely to save him from what is expected to be a lengthy period of piss-taking.
Acorns 325, Rustlers 327